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Today’s Anthem: Jesse McCartney forgets a whole verse of the anthem
MAYOR FRED and the FREAK OF THE WEEK RECAP!
#4 – Tiger’s Wood
#3 – The Colonel
#2 – Mr. Skin
#1 – Shank Skank
- How old is too old to go Trick or Treating? 12. Once you are 13 it is just too old to go Trick or Treating. Cities around the county actual give fines to kids who are over 12 years old that are going door to door. Even close to home – right in Belleville Illinois. ((Guess what Woody is going as for Halloween? 34 years old. ))
- This old woman was trying to change lanes and bumped into the man and his wife’s cart. The couple became mega pissed and started to yell racial slurs at the old broad. He then picked up the old lady – put her on her cart – and rammed her into the conveyor belt four times before she fell to the floor. Cops then say the guy flipped the cart on to the woman so it landed on her like a mini jail. The old lady yelled for cops and an ambulance while she was stuck in her mini cart jail and the dude and his wife STAYED IN LINED AND CHECKED OUT!
- In Cambodia 10 high school girls fainted What happened? The principal says that the girls were all under a spell and the school didn’t offer any type of treatment for it.
- This woman is no doubt super cop. She was at a hair salon getting her hairs did when the place was getting robbed at gunpoint. She came out of the bathroom – and pulled out her gun. The dude fired a shot at her – missed – and then she fired two shots that connected. One through the dudes hand and made the gun fall out. The second was a shot that jammed the lock on the door so the dude couldn’t flee through the front door. AWESOME RIGHT?! Mega swoot!
- The World Series starts tonight. Texas plays the Giants in San Fran
- The NBA Kicked off last night. Heat lost and the Lakers won.
- Paul the World Cup predicting octopus has died….
- Charlie Sheen was put in a hospital last night as he was found in a hotel room hopped on coke and destroying his room….Oh – and he was with a hooker. The fight ensued when Charlie thought the hooker stole his wallet and his cell phone. Reps are saying that it was an allergic reaction to some sort of medicine
- Seth McFarland is creating a foreals movie. It’s called TED. Its about a bear who comes to life…and then won’t leave the guy alone when he’s a grown up. It’ll be rated “R”.
Comedy Central: South Park
Modern Family: Modern Family
NBC: Law & Order
David Letterman: Dana Carvey, Lisa Kelly, Michael Franti & Spearhead
Jay Leno: Robin Williams, Judd Apatow, Kylie Minogue
Jimmy Kimmel: William Shatner, Hilary Duff, A Perfect Circle
Craig Ferguson: Marg Helgenberger, Donald Glover
Jimmy Fallon: Donnie Wahlberg, School of Seven Bells
Carson Daly: David Banner, Jenna Shoemaker, Interpol
Lopez Tonight: Jon Cryer, Patti Stanger, Sean Kingston
Kelly Osborne is 26
Tanya James is 27
Scott Weiland is 43
Matt Drudge is 44
Ted Wass is 58
Ivan Reitman is 64
Jon Cleese is 71
Alexis Silver – 31 – Today’s bday girl is all trick and has shared her treats in 193 films including:
- It Barely Fits Vol 1
- Multi-Racial Mayhem
- Screamin For Semen Vol. 2
- Thanks For The Mammories 2
- Gag Order
- Addicted to Boobs
- 10 Dirty Talking Masturbators
A man in Florida was caught stealing a bag of Cheetos. He was kindly asked to get the hell out and he refused. The cops wanted to arrest this guy but he was resisting. After they finally got him arrested they patted him down and found Ho Ho’s stuffed in his pants.
So this guy sinned. He was convicted of drunk driving, had some other misdemeanor crimes. Just an overall dick. Well – he found Jesus. Which is awesome. Good for him. But here is where the douchey behavior comes in. This a-hole wants to change his name to prove to everyone that he is for sure saved. The new name? St. Jody Almighty of Bedrock. WHAT?! Like Wood says, how about just Douchebag.
BITCH BE TRIPPIN:
- Back in 2007 – the hiccup chick had the hiccups 50 times a minute for like 6 months. She is being charged with 1st degree murder. She faces the death penalty.
- A nurse in the U.K was giving home care to a quadriplegic man and accidentally turned off his LIFE SUPPORT! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! Check out this video! See the video HERE.
- A 27 year old stripper in Atlanta has outed herself as a confidential informant. How? She posted it on Facebook! What a dumb bitch! BITCH BE TRIPPIN’!
- An impatient customer threw two bottles of ranch dressing (delicious) at two store clerks injuring one of them. BITCH BE TRIPPING!
- Two female Pet Psychics say that dogs LOVE when you dress them up from Halloween. Ummm..no they don’t. They are dogs! BITCH BE TRIPPIN
AN EPIC DRIVE BY WHORING! WOW! MEGA EPIC!
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