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Today’s Anthem:It was an awful duo of anthemness
- A woman in the UK says she is just like every normal mother. She breast feeds her 5 month old and her SIX YEAR OLD! Check out a picture of this woman. She says she just feels bad telling her six year old he can’t do it. Sometimes the 6 year old even helps her hold the toddler. It’s gross. Beyond gross actually!
- 38 year old creepster in Illinois wants a wife. Here is the thing…he’s a mega creeper. He will do whatever it takes to get on. He has a website that can help him and he’s even willing to pay you for your troubles. Check out this a-holes website. Click HERE.
- A cop pulled over a man who they expected was driving drunk. Well – that right there is pretty hooshe in itself but our good friend Greg Green decided he wanted to hooshe it up to the next level. Cops got Green to pull over and he accidentally put the car in reverse before finally figuring out how to put the car in park. When cops walked towards the car they saw Green was watching an adult movie on a portable DVD player placed in the passenger seat. Dude was mega crunked up and was arrested for driving while being almost twice over the legal limit.
- Cops in Alabama recently arrested 20 year old Evan Francis Brown and charged him with second-degree assault which is a felony. Well they arrested him after he heated a fork on a stove and branded the letter V into on of his 17 year old friend’s forehead. The reason for the letter “V”? Oh – well Brown is a self proclaimed vampire who goes by the name Vamp. He also is charged with putting out cigarettes on the teenagers face. He claims that he only believes in Satanism. And ((this is actually in the report)) Cops say, “They do not believe claims that he is an actual vampire…” YA THINK?!
- People are becoming cautious because employers are hiring people to check up on them when they take off days for being sick. Well – settle down – the courts said that they can’t do that.
- There is a 67 year old homeless dude who comes into a Burger King. An employee tried to get him to leave but the bum swung at the guy. He swung back – hit him – the bum fell backwards – hit his head on the ground and killed him. Well – the Detroit P.D. is ruling this a HOMICIDE! HE’S BEING CHARGED FOR MURDER!
- Back in 08 a dude was arrested for banging his 15 year old student. So – instead of going to jail – he asked the judge to castrate him…judge said no.
- A woman in NYC is suing cops after cops beat the BEJESUS out of her. You should see some of these pictures.
- It was a crazy weekend in the NFL. First things first…….no surprise here……The Rams got taken to school by Drew Brees and the Saints 31 to 13, therefore the Ram rule is in effect….no mention on the show until they win another game. Despite the loss, the Rams stay tied with the Seahawks in first place in the joke division that is the NFC West. They’re both 6 and 7 after Seattle got their asses kicked by the 49ers 40-21. At 5AM yesterday morning, the roof of the Metrodome in Minnesota caved in from the weight of the snow that was on the dome……obviously they couldn’t play the game there, so the game was postponed and moved…..the game will be played tonight in Detroit. Brett Favre said that if the game had been played at it’s original time, he wouldn’t have been able to play…..but he’s made the trip to Detroit, so we’ll see if he continues his streak.
- A crazy finish in the Redskins/Tampa Bay game……with 13 seconds left in the game, down by 7, Donovan McNabb throws a touchdown to Santana Moss……but then they botch the snap on the extra point….over the head of the holder, game over, Bucs win…..BY ONE! Green Bay QB Aaron Rogers was knocked out of the game with a concussion, the Lions go on to beat the Packers.
- The Jets continue to implode, losing to the Dolphins…but the big story out of this game is about one of the coach’s for the Jets intentionally sticking his knee out on the sideline and tripping a Miami Dolphins player…..who limped off the field, but eventually returned to the game. It’s hard to see the trip, even in slow motion. But it was definitely on purpose, and the coach in question later issued an apology. You can see the video HERE:
- Tom Brady and the Patriots are like the post office….they deliver rain, sleet, snow…..destroying the Bears, in the wind and snow 36 to 7. Other winners yesterday: Pittsburgh, Atlanta, Jacksonville beats Oakland in dramatic fashion, San Diego, and even a win for Buffalo and Arizona this week! Last night on Sunday Night Football……the Eagles beat the Cowboys 30 to 27. Tonight the Giants and Vikings play in Detroit……and on ESPN…..it’s the OFFICIAL Monday Night Game…..The Ravens and the Texans…..kick off is at 7:30pm
- IN COLLEGE FOOTBALL: Even with all the controversy, Auburns’ Cam Newton won the Heisman.
- The Blues lost to the Hurricanes over the weekend in shootouts. They’re off tonight, their next game is Wednesday in Detroit.
- AND FINALLY: The Cardinals traded infielder Brenden Ryan to the Seattle Mariners for some guy named “pitching prospect.”
- Miley Cyrus was caught on video taking a bong hit. Not it’s not of pot – it’s a salvia. Which is legal in California. So – it’s all good. Or is it? People are freaking about it. Get OVER IT!
- Chris Rock calmed a woman down who was going into labor
- Dog The Bounty Hunter is looking for Randy and Evi Quaid
- Nicolas Cage is working out his back taxes
- Debbie Harry said that she got a ride with Ted Bundy back in the day and almost got murdered by him. Ever been to Snopes.com? Well – they say that it was mega false.
Jay Leno: Mark Wahlberg, Olivia Wilde, Good Charlotte
Jimmy Kimmel: Rachael Ray, Garrett Hedlund, Darker My Love
Craig Ferguson: Tom Arnold, Alison Becker, Erica Hill, Chris Wragge, Jeff Glor, Marysol Castro
Jimmy Fallon: Jessica Alba, Colin Quinn, Stephen Bishop
Carson Daly: Danny Boyle, Rob Zabrecky, Two Door Cinema Club (R 11/5/10)
Conan O’Brien: Gwyneth Paltrow, T.J. Miller, Jimmy Eat World
Lopez Tonight: Eric Stonestreet, J.B. Smoove, Dov Davidoff
Actor Dick Van Dyke is 85.
Singer Ted Nugent is 62.
Singer Morris Day of The Time is 54.
Actor Steve Buscemi is 53.
Actor-comedian Jamie Foxx is 43.
Singer-guitarist Tom Delonge of Angels and Airwaves and of Blink-182 is 35.
Singer Amy Lee of Evanescence is 29.
Country singer Taylor Swift is 21.
- AssAholic Anonymous
- Big Fat Apple Bottom Booties
- Booty Juice 10
- Booty Quake
- Big Bubble Butt Latin Sluts
- AssWish 2
- Charlie Mac and the Big Butt Chocolate Factory
Jim Nickerson from Maine is today’s douchebag of the day. He’s a volunteer for the Toys for Tots events up there. Well – officials have noticed that someone had stolen almost $10,000 worth of stuff from the toy drives. What did this douche do? He stole the toys and sold them on eBay. What a jackass. You sir – and the Ultimate Douche…
- CORRECT ANSWER: CANDY CANE!
THE DOGHOUSE: ((BRYAN #1 WINS!))
- SCOTT: He put his kids head in a ceiling fan
- ROBBY: Hinted to his wife: “I’m scared you may get fat…”
- BRYAN #1: GF asked him to clean the gutters – he didn’t – an icicle smashed into her car
- BRYAN #2: Wife got dream pissed over bizarre 2 girlfriends/pregnancy dream…